Salty Coffee

A man who can admit that he's homesick must love his home and care about his family. He must be responsible.

He met her at a party. She was outstanding; many guys were after her, but nobody paid any attention to him. After the party, he invited her for coffee. She was surprised. So as not to appear rude, she went along. 　

As they sat in a nice coffee shop, he was too nervous to say anything and she felt uncomfortable. Suddenly, he asked the waiter, “Could you please give me some salt? I'd like to put it in my coffee.”

They stared at him. He turned red, but when the salt came, he put it in his coffee and drank. Curious, she asked, “Why salt with coffee?” He explained, “When I was a little boy, I lived near the sea. I liked playing in the sea... I could feel it tastes salty, like salty coffee. Now every time I drink it, I think of my childhood and my hometown. I miss it and my parents, who are still there.”

She was deeply touched. A man who can admit that he's homesick must love his home and care about his family. He must be responsible.

She talked too, about her faraway hometown, her childhood, her family. That was the start to their love story.

They continued to date. She found that he met all her requirements. He was tolerant, kind, warm and careful. And to think she would have missed the catch if not for the salty coffee! 　　 　　So they married and lived happily together. And every time she made coffee for him, she put in some salt, the way he liked it.

After 40 years, he passed away and left her a letter which said:

My dearest, please forgive my life-long lie. Remember the first time we dated? I was so nervous I asked for salt instead of sugar.

It was hard for me to ask for a change, so I just went ahead. I never thought that we would hit it off. Many times, I tried to tell you the truth, but I was afraid that it would ruin everything. 　　 　　

Sweetheart, I don't exactly like salty coffee. But as it mattered so much to you, I've learnt to enjoy it. Having you with me was my greatest happiness. If I could live a second time, I hope we can be together again, even if it means that I have to drink salty coffee for the rest of my life.

First Snow

He wasn't sure what had awakened him. Perhaps the child had made some small noise in her sleep. But as he peeked from beneath the covers, his gaze was drawn not to the cradle but to the window.It was then that he realized what had sneaked through the shield of his slumbers. It was the sense of falling snow.

Quietly, so as not to disturb the child's mother, he rose from the bed and inched toward the cradle. Reaching down, he gently lifted the warm bundle to his shoulder. Then, as he tiptoed from the bedroom, she lifted her head, opened her eyes and--daily dose of magic--smiled up at her dad.He carried her downstairs, counting the creaks on the way. Together, they settled in at the kitchen table, and the adult in him slipped away. Two children now, they pressed their noses against the glass.

The light from the street lamp on the corner filtered down through the birch trees, casting a glow as green as a summer memory upon the winter-brown back yard. From the distance came the endless echo of the stoplight, flashing its ruby message, teasing like a dawn that would not come.The flakes were falling thick and hard now, pouring past the window, a waterfall of mystery. Occasionally, one would stick to the glass, as if reluctant to tumble to its fate. Then, slowly, slipping and sliding down the glass, it would melt, its beauty fleeting. Gone.

Within an hour, a white tablecloth was spread upon the lawn. And as gray steaks of dawn unraveled along the black seam of the distant hills, father and daughter watched the new day ripple across the neighborhood.A porch light came on. A car door slammed. A television flickered.

Across the street, a family scurried into gear. But this day was different. Glimpsed through undraped windows as they darted from room to room, the slim figures of the children seemed to grow ever fatter until, finally, the kitchen door flew open and out burst three awesomely bundled objects that set instantly to rolling in the snow.

He wondered where they had learned this behavior. Even the littlest one, for whom this must have been the first real snowfall, seemed to know instinctively what to do.They rolled in it, they tasted it, they packed it into balls and tossed it at one another. Then, just when he thought they might not know everything, they set about shaping a snowman on the crest of the hill.

By the time the snowman's nose was in place, the neighborhood was fully awake. A car whined in protest, but skidded staunchly out of its driveway. Buses ground forward like Marines, determined to take the hill. And all the while, the baby sat secure and warm in his arms.

He knew, of course, that she wouldn't remember any of this. For her there would be other snowfalls to recall. But for him, it was her first. Their first. And the memory would stay, cold and hard, fresh in his thoughts, long after the snowman melted.

Effective Emotional Management--the Proper Release of Anger

Q: What can I do when I'm angry or hurt? How can I stop these feelings?

A: Don't stop them; don't stop your anger or hurt feelings. Just go through them quickly, with no resentment--and heal them afterwards. Anger, hurt and pain are natural feelings of the physical elements. It's just that you don't know how to handle anger; that's the problem. It's OK: If someone hurts you, of course you feel hurt. You're not a wooden table! And when people provoke you unreasonably or you think that they provoke you, you're bound to be angry

That's all right, but we must understand that by nature anger is not very constructive most of the time. So if you have to be angry, just get it over with. Don't try to suppress too much of your anger or you'll become sick and feel crazy. Anger is a natural feeling; it's just that you shouldn't carry it too long or you'll drown yourself in it. That's no good for you or for the other party involved

So get angry and talk. You don't have to be sarcastic or hurtful when you talk; just air your views and tell them that they made you angry because of whatever reason and you hope that in the future it doesn't happen again because you won't tolerate it. Air your views, be finished and love each other again.

When we were young, most of us were taught that we shouldn't show anger and hurt. And so we keep repressing them, thinking that they're no good. But these are natural feelings within us; we can't help it. So we can just let it be, but now we know the anger, its quality and its real face; we're in control of it and we don't allow the anger to be our master. That's all. We just know, "OK, I'm angry because you hurt me." If someone hits you, you feel pain. That's natural. So just say it because sometimes it's just a misunderstanding; you talk to the person and he has a chance to explain, saying, "No, I didn't mean it that way. I meant it this way." And then, either way it will be good. If the person didn't mean it, then you don't feel angry anymore. And if the person really did mean something bad, after he hears that you're hurt, pained or angry, he'll change because he understands. And that's good for both of you. Otherwise, we always end up saying, "You give me a headache," "You're a pain in the neck" or "You're a pain in the somewhere else."

It's true. Anger suppressed can make you physically ill. So don't hurt yourself more by swallowing the poisonous anger within you. Spit it out, just in a proper way.

A Mother's Advice

A daughter who was betrothed to her husband went far away, and then before she left for her husband's house her mother gave her very, very good advice. The mother didn't cry and did not let the daughter cry. Instead she said, "You must listen to me. This is a very happy day. God has blessed you with a good husband , (everyone laugh), who doesn't gamble, who doesn't fool around with other women, who doesn't drink, who doesn't cheat; but who's honest, charitable, gentle, moral, virtuous and handsome (everyone laughs) inside and outside." Inside he was more beautiful than outside. Inside he is white, even though outside he is black. (everyone laugh.) So the daughter was smiling and listening with care, love and attention to the mother.

And the mother said, "Now, you go to your new home. Treat your relatives in-law as your own. Respect your mother and father in-law as you have respected me and your father. Respect your husband as your only God, friend, protector, and the most beloved and respected person on the Earth planet; so that later you'll make a shining example for your children and bring glory, happiness and pride to your new family. You owe that to your husband, to myself and your father and all your sisters and brothers in our family to fulfill this duty. And you owe it to yourself as well as your husband to glorify all of us in this way.

Take care of your family, your husband's property and business so that it'll prosper, and it'll bring loftiness, security and abundance to your family so that your children will live in comfort. There's nothing to be sad about today, there's only the exciting future and new challenge waiting for you. To be loved by a husband is the most beautiful thing in the world. You should endure to be a good wife, so that you have all this happiness and success in your life."

So the daughter said, "But, what can I do to fulfill all these noble obligations and this beautiful duty that you have just told me about?"

The mother said, "You must eat well, dress well, and sleep soundly everyday." The daughter said, "Yes, mother, I understand."

So when she went to the family in-law, she did exactly that: Slept well, ate well, dressed beautifully everyday. All the family members in-law were so happy with her. She raised beautiful, obedient, clever, hard working, hard studying children for the husband and the family in-law.

Other people came and asked for her secret, "How did you make it? You came from such a far away place, you knew nothing about the customs of this land, and yet, you did so well. How did you do it?" 　

The daughter in-law, now mother of three, matriarch of the family, (everyone laugh), female boss of the husband's company, secretary in chief, housekeeper of the whole household, ( everyone laugh) a nurse to the elders and fragile mother and father in-law, a family leader for the younger brothers and sisters in-law etcetera, etcetera, etcetera, and an assistant but loving mother of three beautiful, healthy intelligent children said very humbly, "I achieved all this due to the loving advice of my mother."

So everyone of course said, "Give me, give me please - tell me, tell me, tell me." "MMy mother told me before I came here a sad bride, that I should go to my family in-law: sleep soundly, eat very well, and dress chic." ( everyone laugh.) So everyone said "What? What kind of advice is that? And you did exactly just that to run your family?" She said, "Y"Yes, I did exactly just that: ate well, slept soundly, and dressed chic everyday. That's what I did." They said, "H"How? What do you mean? By just enjoying this, you ran your family and everything went along well? Please explain to us. Are you joking or something?"

She said, "N"No! No! What my mother meant by eating well was that I must take care of the whole family, feed them all, including the guests, until they are all full and satisfied, then I eat myself what is left over; because after everyone is satisfied no one will disturb me anymore. I'll be hungry by then (everyone laughs) -- having run around -- so whatever is left over, doesn't matter what, will be very tasty, delicious (everyone laughs); nourishing and will have a lot of blessing power. I pray to Buddha before I eat (everyone laugh) and Buddha blesses my food. So whatever I eat becomes nectar. My body is strong, my palate is satisfied, my heart is contented; so I can offer my best service to my family after I'm well fed, satisfied and have enjoyed a delicious meal in all quietness and tranquility. When everyone is satisfied and full, they also love me and of course their loving feelings also bless me as well because I took care of them very well. All their good wishes and their contented feelings will also bless me, and I share the merit of their happiness; I share their happiness as well. So that's the secret of: eating well."

Then they said, "Y"You sleep every night soundly? You just worry about sleep?" She said, "N"No! What my mother meant by sleeping well is that, after everyone is asleep, I take care of all the doors, turn off all the lights, make sure everything is in place and secured so that the thieves do not come in, take care of all the family members that everyone is well, sound asleep; and then I don't worry. Then my heart is very calm and relaxed because I know they are all well taken care of and warm in their blankets; that they sleep all night long and they will never get up and disturb me, ask for anything, or be sick; then I don't have to worry. Then I sleep myself very soundly too because there's nothing else to do. (everyone laugh.) That's what my mother meant

And the others were feeling very surprised and impressed about the wisdom of the mother, as well as the wisdom of the daughter. Of course, like mother like daughter.

AAnd now about the last one, please, about the last one. Oh! Why do you have to dress well?" So she said, "Y"Yes! Dressing well means you have to be always properly dressed and tidy. You dress yourself with a big smile when you wake up in the morning and the last thing before you go to bed. You dress yourself with all the loving kindness that God has bestowed within your heart. So when people see you, they see an angel, they see love written in your face, they see blessings shinning in your eyes, they see God in your benevolent smile. That's what my mother meant by dressing well.

"So that's how I dress myself everyday. That's how I feed myself to health everyday. That's how I sleep to sweet dreams every night. And if all of you do that, your family members, your in-laws, will be also as well as mine right here!" So everyone of course bowed, clapped, smiled, dressed themselves well, and went home. 　

May You Always Have Positive Thoughts

　　May every day of your life bring you fresh hopes for tomorrow---because hopes give us all our reason for trying.
　　May each new day bring a feeling of excitement, joy, and a wonderful sense of expectation. Expect the best, and you'll get it
　　May you find peace in simple things, because those are the ones that will always be there.
　　May you remember the good times and forget the sorrow and pain, for the good times will remind you of how special your life has been.
　　May you always feel secure and loved, and know you are the best.
　　May you experience all the good things in life---the happiness of realizing your dreams, the joy of feeling worthwhile, and the satisfaction of knowing you've
succeeded.
　　May you find warmth in others, expressions of love and kindness, smiles that encourage you, and friends who are loyal and honest.
　　May you realize the importance of patience and accept others for what they are. With understanding and love, you'll find the good in every heart.
　　May you have faith in others and the ablity to be vulnerable. Open your heart and really share the miracle of love and intimacy.
　　You're listening to Faith Radio Online-Simply to Relax, I'm Faith. Above all, may you always have positive thoughts.

Self-Awareness—Virginia Woolf

The man who is aware of himself is henceforth independent; and he is never bored, and life is only too short, and he is steeped through and hrough with profound yet temperate happiness. Healone lives, while other people, slaves of ceremony, let life slip past time in a kind of dream. Once conform ,once do what other people do finer than they do it, and a lethargy steals over all the finer nerves and faculties of the soul, He becomes all outer show and inward emptiness; dull, callous, and indifferent.

Facing the Enemies Within

Let me tell you about five of the other enemies we face from within.

The first enemy that you've got to destroy before it destroys you is indifference. What a tragic disease this is! “Ho-hum, let it slide. I'll just drift along.” Here's one problem with drifting: you can't drift your way to the top of the mountain.

The second enemy we face is Indecision. Indecision is the thief of opportunity and enterprise. It will steal your chances for a better future. Take a sword to this enemy.

The third enemy inside is doubt. Sure, there's room for healthy skepticism. You can't believe everything. But you also can't let doubt take over. Many people doubt the past, doubt the future, doubt each other, doubt the government, doubt the possibilities and doubt the opportunities. Worse of all, they doubt themselves. I'm telling you, doubt will destroy your life and your chances of success. It will empty both your bank account and your heart. Doubt is an enemy. Go after it. Get rid of it.

The fourth enemy within is worry. We've all got to worry some. Just don't let it conquer you. Instead, let it alarm you. Worry can be useful. If you step off the curb in New York City and a taxi is coming, you've got to worry. But you can't let worry loose like a mad dog that drives you into a small corner. Here's what you've got to do with your worries: drive them into a small corner. Whatever is out to get you, you've got to get it. Whatever is pushing on you, you've got to push back.

The fifth interior enemy is overcaution. It is the timid approach to life. Timidity is not a virtue; it's an illness. If you let it go, it'll conquer you. Timid people don't get promoted. They don't advance and grow and become powerful in the marketplace. You've got to avoid overcaution.